So this has been a very weird week.  After over a month of on again off again fevers and infections I dragged myself off to the doctor and finally have an answer.  Mono, or at least something very like it.  The symptoms are identical but the virus itself can’t be identified.  Which is rude in my opinion, I mean I’m really not a fan of having to name every strain of flu that comes along to make is sound so much more earth shattering, but when you’ve been laid low it is nice to know by what.

We’ve named it Duo.

But thinking about being so ill has made me strangely focused, my mind heading in one direction.  Health.   The reacquiring of and the avoidance of losing again.  It is obsessing my mind and rightly so, as I feel that I’ve neglected my own health for quite some time now.  Looking back over the last few months I was surprised when I realised that I couldn’t remember the last time I felt full of beans.  Not a good sign.  Having suffered from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome in my 20’s I am NOT keen to go there again.

For months I have been working well below par and sinking slowly further and further as time has gone on.  Then I reached crisis after crisis with full on bouts of flu keeping me in bed, diminishing my strength, health and appetite for food and life.   Something had to change.

Luckily I have an amazing support network that has rallied round with advice on how I can get my system back online, and right now I am willing to try them all.  My lovely pal Erin (who recently been through the same type of health trials) got me onto the path of juicing.  She swears it has made a huge difference, so I am giving it a try and will post more about my efforts as the week goes on.  Erin also saved my bacon by finding a wonderful lady who does respite care for mums with young babies and children, hiring her for a couple of mornings gave me some time to rest and recuperate, just what I needed.

The wonderful Cheryl whizzed over to my house tout sweet with her juicer so that there would be no delay in the nutrition extravaganza beginning, Huwyl and I had much fun making the apple, pear and ginger mix and he has asked for it continuously since – I’d say it was a hit!

I’ve been touched by the kindness of friends offering help despite their own life plate being somewhat overloaded (yes Michelle you crazy pillow fluffer, that means you) and so many kind words and concern from peeps scattered all over the world, it has helped me to feel positive during this transition.   I’ve had to make some hard choices this week as I’ve thought carefully about what I should be focusing my energy on and what needs to be sacraficed.

Luckily I have the sounding boards of my family, my Dad, my sister and Stephen to run my ideas past.  They’ve listened to me complain, theorise and plan with inexhaustive patience.    I’ve also had the iron clad support of my beloved as he carried both his more than full time work responsibilities and my work around the home on his broad shoulders.  His determination to keep everything moving forward as well as his kindness and concern for me has helped me to see the sunshine beyond the clouds even when I couldn’t get my head off the pillow.

This is all starting to sound a bit like an acceptance speech at the Oscar’s isn’t it?  But the thing is I think that a situation like this can have many blessings within it.  I’ve experienced difficult illness before and I’ve learned to look beyond the experience and try to deduce the message within, what is it that I am supposed to learn from all of this?  I’ve come up with a few ideas and will continue to ponder, here’s what I have so far:

– Prioritise – What do I need to let go of even if I don’t want to?  What should my day to day priorities be?

– Focus – Let go of some of the unhelpful or extraneous thinking and focus on what matters.

– Rest – Don’t feel guilty for needing rest time, organise life so that good quality sleep and some rest during the day is possible most of the time.

– Nutrition – Re-energise my thinking on food and what is possible for us as a family.  Look at eating as a gateway to health and vitality.  Get excited about new avenues and experiment.

I guess this is my Mono Manifesto, my way of fighting back against the cloud of yuckiness that has engulfed me these last months.  My aim is to turn this experience into a Reboot, a way to start again and do things better.  Whenever I think of this virus wreaking havoc on my system I hear Bugs Bunny at his finest, Of course you know, this means war.

This juicer is loaded and I’m ready to use it.  Laters.

7 thoughts on “Monosyllabic

  1. oh Emma,I am sorry to hear about your trials of late. Mostly sorry because I truly understand and have been there for more than one winter/spring in recent years. It is so hard to learn these lessons when we are so depleted and it takes things like a complete flattening from illness, or in my case, this late winter/early spring, a complete removal from my daily life (on the road endlessly with no way to avoid it). Truly nothing in this life happens without reason and you are right to look at the lessons needing to be learned.
    I do believe there really is something to the juice thing – we have been taking acai juice since January and I believe with everything in me that it is boosting my immune system in ways that have made a difference. Goodness knows that my sleep and stress levels remain unchanged, so the difference is in the juice.
    Be well. Someday, when I find myself in Ottawa, we will have tea;)

    • Thanks Julia, it has been a tough couple of months but we are working through. The road has to have bumps as well as good views I suppose! It is good to know that you’ve had a good experience with juicing, I’m building myself up to veggie juice but I’m not there yet. If you come to Ottawa, though, I promise I won’t make you drink anything yucky, tea and cake all the way ; )

  2. Emma… so sorry to hear this. I hope you are on the mend soon with all the juicing, rest, care of friends/family and vitamin cocktails! Hope to see you before I pop and get some inspiration for this birth… always feel you have some sort of magical uplifting effect on me! Chin up and soak in all the support around you! xo

    • I will be kicking Mono’s botty don’t you worry ; ) I’d love to see you whenever you can get some free time, I am so excited for you on this next birth and I have lots of tips! It would be lovely to see you, it seems like forever. Let’s make it soon!

  3. Mono manifesto….I love it! So proud of you for seeing the opportunities in a succession of shitty illness. I am thinking of you and can’t wait to see you soon….New Moon is on DVD….we can organize a “feel-good” movie evening to help you laugh and get better 🙂

    • lmao, I can think of nothing more cheering than a good New Moon session, though I think that Bella’s overwheming range of emotions might be too much for my delicate system!!

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